I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
