We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize