So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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