I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
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