Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
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