i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
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