I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize