I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
