people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize