THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
