Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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