Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
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