How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
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