I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Randomize
