so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
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