I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
