did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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