I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
