I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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