And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize