if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize