I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
