I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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