dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
