oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
