Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Randomize
