Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize