Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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