He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
