question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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