What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize
