I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Randomize
