What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Michael Bay diarrhea
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
