Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
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