I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
