I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
