I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize