Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize
