i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
