can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Randomize
