he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
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