She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
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