Christians are straight up FREAKS
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
