Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
