May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
