I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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