Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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