then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
