No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Randomize
