even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
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he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I'm too high and old for this...
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
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