Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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